Sunday was one of those quintessential crisp fall days for
my drive back from Ann Arbor. Blue skies with a few cumulus clouds
scattered, the trees changing into their fall clothes, replete with shimmering,
luminescent reds, oranges and yellows.
At Zingerman’s in Ann
Arbor, one of the
delicatessens in the country, I bought a Sherman Rueben for the trip home and
cookies for my nursing staff.
I stopped at the Phoenix Restaurant in Chicago Chinatown to
pick up my father’s favorite ho fun (beef rice noodles) and told the owner
Eddie and daughter Carol about Teri’s passing.
Eddie said told me about a friend who also died of acute leukemia and
said pragmatically, “Life goes on.” Teri
and I used to eat at the Phoenix every several
weeks, the best dim sum in the Midwest,
rivaling the coasts. I picked up cha siu
bao (roast pork buns) from St. Anna’s Bakery and cha siu hanging next to the
dripping ducks at the BBQ King, just as we always did. Memories.
Backtracking to a fatherly-sonly Saturday.
I was invited to speak at the national APAMSA conference as
I continue on my mission to help Asian Americans succeed as 3rd year
medical students, and sequentially as physicians and professionals. My usual topic is on educational profiling of
quiet Asian Americans medical students during their clinical rotations as
‘passive’ with it pejorative effect on their evaluations, and ways to
counteract it. Ben said that his group
felt my presentation was the best one of the conference. No bias there.
It was so so unique
and heart warming to be able to share this APAMSA experience with Ben who
attended as a representative of Michigan
State. Ben has been to NASPGHAN annual meeting but
this was a conference where he was an official attendee and we both highly engaged in
Asian American professional development and health issues, he in the present
tense, me in the past tense. He
experienced an adolescent APAMSA that I helped give life to way back in 1995 at
this 19th national conference.
He even listened to his old man say something that was directly
pertinent to him. Ben volunteered to
provide feedback during a workshop exercise on leadership and I got to listen
to my young man provide insight that the workshop leader acknowledged was
astute. Perhaps a father-son scenario a
father could only dream about. Wow, how
cool is that!
Backtracking to a surprise Friday.
After driving from Ben’s apartment in Lansing
to Ann Arbor, I
met with Chris a friend and fellow pediatric GI who is the interim CEO of
Mott’s Children’s Hospital. We go way
back and besides being constantly reminded of our Ohio State-Michigan rivalry,
we resonate around the attitudes that we look up at the world as underdogs,
have a strong sense of justice, and don’t take ourselves too seriously. After asking me about what I wanted to do
when I grow up … he suggested I consider looking at a potential global exchange
position at UM that would place me in China part time. It’s nice to be wanted.
I invited Ben’s MSU delegation (7) and our MCW delegation
(2) to APAMSA to dinner at Kai’s Chinese restaurant in Ann Arbor.
We had about 9 or so dishes, and finished them all. It’s amazing how
much these skinny Asian women can eat.
Afterwards, Serena (MSU) and I lit a 30 candle, ‘surprised’ (suspected
it at the last minute) Ben and we all sang Happy Birthday to him. I got to share lovely stories of how Teri
busted him after he came home red-faced from a party and how the cops brought
him home in handcuffs at 4 am just before the start of his freshman year (for
TPing). Ben has done well on parole.
Post-conference
I paid a visual tribute to Teri and Jack, highlighted her
last teaching lesson and dedicated the talk to her as part of my plea for Asian
American medical students to join the bone marrow donor registry. Mike, one of the conference organizers of the
APAMSA conference wrote to me, “Teri sounds like an incredible person”. Teri is still making a difference.
Pictures to come.
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